Art Of Dying - Die Trying

Sometimes I feel like that boy I once knew looking for his father. But then I realize I am my father.

Alone I look into my future. Somewhat uncertain. I know where Im going but I have to pick my path.

I am human and make mistakes. Its what makes me mortal. I envy my brother and sister because they always knew the path and followed it. Im the black sheep. Always ridiculed and hated. Maybe Ill find my way. But now I am lost.

The only person I can help is myself. It seems when I help others I am disrespected and treated like garbage. No one helps me. I always figure it out. This is my greatest gift and strength. Adversity makes me stronger. When held down I rise up stronger than before.

I dont ever think about my happiness. I think Im always tasked with making someone happy rather than myself. Its lonely and I get angry often. I feel neglected and unwanted. Every relationship has been like this. I try my hardest and try to apply all the lessons I learned from before. But somehow I end up in the same place I was before. Lonely and unloved.

Maybe Im destined to be alone. The faster I figure that out the faster I can move on and be happy.

Human nature

Its in our nature to be around someone when they're nice to you. Its also natural to not want to be around someone when they're mean to you. Some people dont get that.

Feeling better

I dont hurt anymore. Im at peace now. Feels good to wake up and no ones arguing with me. I dont have to hear the complaints anymore.